speaking words of wisdom let it be

My latest project:

So if i had to share some wisedom or whatever, i would have two things to share, and funnyily enough they both came from church

1) Reflect what you believe- if you really believe something your actions need to reflect that, you cant say one thing and do another.
That lesson really has nothing to do with this journal but i thought i would share it none the less.

2) Now i cant really remember the proper way this was worded but it was something like "make your life a story worth telling" and i know that almost sounds a little harsh because really life sometimes is just gonna happen but i like the idea of life being a story and being able to contribute to that story.

switching tracks.

I love journals, i never go anywhere withough mine and i love making them. So i made this journal for you yes you who is reading this now because if finding a random hand painted (ha) journal made specifically for me by someone i dont know cant be a part of my story i want it to be a part of yours. Much love!
-a friend"

rule of life number 38

I suppose I have alot to talk about, but before i start writing i should mention how i was thinking about this on the bus and how maybe blogs are a little silly...i sit here and write out all the things i think and feel and then you sit there and read them...i dont know why but suddently this feels strange to me, but at the same time, if i write this now i can compartmentalize my thoughts and i will have to answer less questions later.

I should also metnion that my head is spinning so hopefully this makes some sense.
I will start with the concrete

My job, so...I really like the work part of my job, for the most part its awesome, i get to do stuff like go swimming and play monster trucks, there are little things that happen at each shift that makes me smile, like the other day one of my clients told me he knew God and I asked him what he was like and he just smiled and after a long pause told me that his(God's) name was steven.
But the hours have changes so much, and everytime i try to quite or mention that im unhappy my boss just acts really nice or promises that they will do better the next week, Im a sucker and this keeps happening, i need to like fully detach myself even if they are very nice the hours are important for me to like continue.

My stuff with the simple way, so after farther communications it seems the simple way has decieded to not take interns this year, this makes me a little sad cause i was really stoked, but at the same time i feel peace, i know i will be lead to where i need to go.

This brings us to the question of "what now?" and my answer is i have no friggen clue...you know how christians usually use terms like "God will open a door" well i want God to open and door and shove me through it cause everything just seems so up in the air.
On the note, i would like to put it out there that if anyone knows of any cool oppurtinites i would be very much intrested in hearing about them...

I had much more that i wanted to write about but i think i will leave it at this for right now.
Please pray about my job stuff and my life stuff.
thanks friends
:)

if they came from the gate

I feel like a zombie...

to make you feel my love

Brianne got married.
My best friend of the past many years got married.
and I am so happy for her.

The day started out with champange and truffles and humus and getting ready.
Although I had been up till approx 2 am that night, watching my mom work on my dress (thats just how she rolls, it stresses me out to the extreme but i suppose i cant change her)
Brianne and I drove to the ranch house together, big black clouds all over the sky. We arrive and there is a flustered shuffle to make sure Matt doesnt see Bri and we go to the sage room to get dressed. Then its annonced that its raining and we have to stay indoors, but it true calgary fashion it rained for 5 minutes and then we where able to be outside.

Then there is a dramatic walk down the aisle, a few tears and a kiss and now Brianne is a dempsey.

I am incrediably happy for Brianne and Matt, and incrediably happy that this could be a part of my love tour.


SO here we are, I think this was one of the big steps for the summer. The next is sojourners and finding a new church.
The first in that sentence i am slightly nervous for but only slightly just cause we havent really had a chance to plan, the second i am extremely nervous for, the last time i stepped foot in a north american church i left shaking, the last time i had interaction with a christian i didnt know made me cry. so yeah...we will see what happens but this week i am going to try out "Friends Church"

rock climbing

My job is proving to have some intresting challenges but im also coming out of it with some lovely stories.

The past week and this coming week, I am supporting a girl with autism at a day camp, on tuesday, on our way back to the day camp from horsebacking riding, my client and i were sitting at the back of the bus. Right behind us in the wheelchair section was this prescious and hilarous boy, he was all the way at the back but wanted really badly to talk to the counslors,they couldnt hear him so they said "E, im busy, i'll talk to you when i get off the bus" and E said "oh okay then...then I'll just say wee, WEEEEEEEEEEE WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WEEEEEEEEE" he did that for the rest of the bus ride.

This is one of my favorite stories of life "okay then i'll just say wee"

home base care in canada WORD

So, I am very happy to announce that I ended my 3 shift career at 7 11 and just started at a new WONDERFUL organization called DDRC, I am a community service worker and my job is to go to the homes of children who are developmentally disabled, promote Independence with them through different activities whilst supporting and giving there family a break. when I realized that this is basically home base care it made me so stoked,
way to go Jesus for tying everything together...

we only have today...

so I can now write down a date beside love tour vancouver/east hastings

on tuesday night at approx 10:40 pm leanna and i got into her old cop car and drove to vancouver, we had decieded to go probably 2 hours prior to leaving. how beautiful.

We slept in her car and just did random things. we walked around east hastings trying to find pastor joe but we couldnt find him...we did run into some lovely people, George and Jill (but i will write a specific post about them later) and my lovely africa friends steph and darryl.

over all it was quite the adventure. Jesus and I got to hang out on english bay and He reminded me about hope a few times....

I wish that I could say it was a complete success and I just went a loved people but here i am being reminded again that I mess up alot...wouldnt it be easier if we could all just be perfectly lovely and nice and wonderful all the time?

I read this out loud in the car to leanna and this is how I desire to love others

"I was neurotic for years. I was anxious and depressed and selfish. Everyone kept telling me to change.
I resented them, and i agreed with them, and i wanted to change, but simply couldnt, no matter how hard i tried.
what hurt the most was, that like the others, my best friend kept inisiting that i change. so i felt powerless and trapped. then one day He said to me "Dont change. I love you just as you are"
Those words were music to my ears: "Dont change. Dont change. Dont change... i love you as you are"
I relaxed. I came alive. and suddently i changed!
Now i know that i couldnt really change until i found someone who would love me whether i changed or not."

(this is from "the song of the bird")

Im begining to see that the love tour is not going to be just me going places and loving others that its also going to be a adventure of learning to love and being loved myself.